Wrestling’s biggest weekend HAS ARRIVED! That’s right, it’s WrestleMania Weekend, and it promises to be the most stupendous weekend of all our lives. We’ve got two nights of WWE WrestleMania action with plenty of opportunities to make your pocketbook stupendous, so let’s hook it up!

Odds subject to change and provided by BetOnline.

Drew McIntyre (-1000) vs. Happy Corbin (+500)

still trying to wrap my head around WWE having no IC title, US title, or Andre Battle Royal at WrestleMania but having a Happy Corbin singles match

— Soundwave (@LocalSoundwave) March 29, 2022

Is it just me? Am I the only one that remembers the the last time Corbin was a decided underdog at WrestleMania? (To be honest, maybe it wasn’t the most recent time, these recent WMs all tend to flow together for me.) I remember when Corbin was booked against Kurt Angle in the Olympic Hero’s retirement match. Everybody thought Angle would win on the way out, mostly because they didn’t think Corbin deserved the rub of winning Angle’s final match. These people probably also don’t think that Corbin deserves to beat Drew McIntyre. Which is probably true. One of these men could be a world title challenger after WrestleMania and it ain’t Happy Corbin.

I’m not saying to put your money on ol’ Happy…I am saying that the odds could be a bit closer. Corbin could easily shock the world again, especially with Madcap Moss running around at ringside. Drew McIntyre should win, but Corbin’s chances of victory are more than you might think.

Mystery Opponent (-450) vs. Seth Rollins (+275)

At WrestleMania, @WWERollins will be surrounded by all of my true supporters with nowhere else to go.

I'll see you Saturday, Mr. Freakin' Rollins…but, you won't see me. pic.twitter.com/EYxEWnUxvM

— Vacant 👤 (@WWEVacant) March 30, 2022

So everybody believes that Cody Rhodes will be the mystery opponent. Some might argue they should have gone ahead and debuted Cody already, but I disagree. To me, the idea of Cody Rhodes is worth more than actually having Cody Rhodes. Ever since Cody left AEW, it seems like everybody remembered how much they liked him! It’s quite odd how much interest he generates now versus how much people thought of his AEW work & reality show. Not that I’m blaming anybody. Heck, I haven’t been this interested in Cody Rhodes since the first Full Gear show. I get where people are coming from here.

Should Cody be the mystery opponent, one assumes he would win on his first night. It’s tempting to think that Vince McMahon would want to blame Cody for leaving and find some polka dots for him to wear while losing to everybody under the sun. It’s more likely that WWE brass realizes that AEW talent with loyalty to Cody will be watching what he does there. Should Cody fare well, there will be people in AEW that see WWE as a potential greener pasture, in more ways than just the color of money.

There is the fun speculation about the mystery opponent actually being Shane McMahon, or a scenario where Shane is the first mystery and someone else (Cody) is the second. In the first scenario, Rollins would be a smart pick. In the second, I’m not sure how the oddsmakers would handle it. Would it be based off what the first opponent does? Tough to say. The more I think about it I’m leaning towards this darn thing being a push and nobody winning. Which is just as well, as I generally wouldn’t recommend betting on matches with mystery opponents anyway.

Logan Paul & The Miz (-120) vs. Dominik & Rey Mysterio (-120)

The Miz saying he’s never seen someone take to wrestling faster than Logan Paul has 👀 pic.twitter.com/1FPsywtMMa

— Jonathan (@JPsWrestling) March 27, 2022

WrestleMania is not for people like me. I’m an old man that has never had any interest in the Pauls and their YouTube antics, and there’s really nothing they can do to change that. It isn’t a personal dislike or anything like that, I’m just not into that culture. They’re not trying to get people like me to buy in anyway, so it doesn’t really matter. All that matters for the purposes of this exercise is if Logan Paul can draw a good number of his fans to watch WrestleMania, and maybe get them to stick around for other shows. Will it work? Beats the heck out of me!

If nothing else, Logan Paul is in good hands here, as Rey will do his best to make him look good. The Miz will do his thing and get heat, and Dominik will try to stay out of the way. This should be some good ol’ fashioned sports entertainment where the Mysterios get the duke. Unless Paul & Miz are going to form a regular tag team, there’s no reason for them to win here.

Sheamus & Ridge Holland (-200) vs. The New Day (+150)

They introduced Kofi Kingston as being "accompanied by Xavier Woods" before Kingston came out solo and revealed that he is … accompanied by Xavier Woods

— John Pollock (@iamjohnpollock) March 26, 2022

Apparently this was going to be a six-man tag also involving Big E & BUTCH, but E’s injury changed those plans. I’m a bit surprised that Sheamus & Holland are favored, but they are much bigger than Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods. They’re also from across the pond, so I can see the BetOnline crowd throwing a ton of money on their hometown boys.

Me, I’d go with Xavier & Kofi avenging their fallen comrade. Why not give New Day fans a feel-good moment here?

WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship
The Usos (-220) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs (+155)

Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs reflect on all of their adventures in the all-new @Toyota Tundra 🚴🏄⛰

WWE Universe, where will the Toyota #Tundra take you? #LetsGoPlaces #ad pic.twitter.com/7iNeZUvhEP

— WWE (@WWE) March 18, 2022

I’m surprised this is as close as it is, but then again, our challengers are a long-time Japanese favorite and an Internet meme come to life. So I can kind of see it. What I can’t see is the Usos losing the tag titles here, as the Bloodline has had a dominant year and look like they’ll keep it going.

Did I just spoil my main event pick? Whoops.

WWE Raw Women’s Championship
Becky Lynch (+300) vs. Bianca Belair (-500)

Joke’s on you @BiancaBelairWWE. I look cool af. #WrestleMania pic.twitter.com/oOPyk7fEE6

— The Man (@BeckyLynchWWE) March 30, 2022

If Becky’s new do is any indication, Bianca has truly missed her calling as a hairdresser. I’m sure being Raw Women’s Champion would pay better, but the lives she could have changed with some scissors…I mean, Brutus Beefcake couldn’t do something half that good!

In all seriousness, this would seem to be the part of our story where Bianca Belair gets revenge for the whole 30 second loss at SummerSlam thing. One could argue that Becky Lynch has a good chance at victory due to Bianca getting the last laugh on the go-home show…but look at her hair! Obviously Big Time Becks got the upper hand on that issue.

WWE Smackdown Women’s Championship
Charlotte Flair (+425) vs. Ronda Rousey (-800)

. @MsCharlotteWWE the kind of pain you brag about inflicting on me isn’t even enough for me to eat for breakfast – it’s the pastry I eat with my coffee before breakfast because I don’t want drink my mocha latte on an empty stomach. #AndTheNew #WrestleMania38 pic.twitter.com/ECV8zL55UR

— Ronda Rousey (@RondaRousey) March 19, 2022

This sort of feud is where basic wrestling storytelling has its drawbacks. Both Charlotte Flair & Ronda Rousey are great athletes. A wrestling match featuring them should be a good piece of business and get a good number of stars. There’s one big issue that becomes apparent when you try to have them do a feud on wrestling television: Neither Charlotte nor Ronda are particularly likeable, at least not to the majority of WWE’s fanbase.

See, in real sports this doesn’t really matter. You put the two best athletes out there, have them go at it and people tune in. Real sports doesn’t fill months of television with them trying to have a feud and have one of them be the protagonist & one of them be the antagonist. Take UFC, where Ronda came from. Both Jorge Masvidal & Colby Covington were clearly heels, but nobody cared. People still wanted to see them beat the crap out of each other.

Maybe people still feel the same way about Charlotte or Ronda. Alls I know for sure is that Ronda Rousey is winning this thing.

What Will Happen First:
Stone Cold Stunners Kevin Owens (-800) vs. Kevin Owens Stunners Stone Cold (+450)

The last time Austin truly got physical on WWE TV was 11 years ago on Monday Night Raw in a segment with Alex Riley and The Miz.

He's hit plenty of Stunners since then, but in this rare instance, we got all the offense.

I could see Mania giving us at least this. pic.twitter.com/6MHIU5ZdSJ

— Will Washington  (@WilliamRBR) March 29, 2022

I mean, you gotta be able to bet on something for this segment, I suppose. Seems like the easiest pick of the night…until you consider the fact that the Stunner is one of the safer moves in KO’s moveset for Austin to take. Could there be a chance for Owens to get some temporary satisfaction?

Nah. I see Owens hitting the kick to the gut, but Austin blocks that Stunner stuff.

WWE Raw Tag Team Championship
RK-Bro (-150) vs. Street Profits (+150) vs. Alpha Academy (+400)

If true than RK-Bro just hit the jackpot. pic.twitter.com/DVF0cQXzHH

— #1RandyOrtonSource (@BaltOs1Fan) March 30, 2022

Randy Orton is having a lot of fun teaming with Riddle, and I’m happy for him. It doesn’t seem like anybody is looking to turn anytime soon, and the RK-Bro act is pretty popular with the WWE Universe. I’d keep riding it until it’s a little less popular.

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship
Zelina Vega & Carmella (+500) vs. Naomi & Sasha Banks (-200) vs. Liv Morgan & Rhea Ripley (+185) vs. Shayna Baszler & Natalya (+750)

I swear @RheaRipley_WWE knows what she's doing with these pins now, look at her face 🤣 #WWERaw pic.twitter.com/irBvanfBAD

— NINBEN (@TheNINBEN) March 29, 2022

There’s a lot going on here. We’ve got tag team champions in Zelina & Carmella that get pretty decent heat, at least from the Internet. Naomi/Sasha & Liv/Rhea seem equally beloved, while Shayna & Natalya are there to hold things together. Which won’t be easy to do in a fatal four-way tag team match. Naomi & Sasha are the favorites, and giving them this kind of win on a big show seems like a nice thing to do. Only problem: Have you seen Sasha’s WrestleMania record? She’s 0-6. One more loss will tie her with Goldust for the worst WrestleMania record of all time.

That seems like reason enough to give Sasha (and Naomi) the win, but if you’re looking elsewhere? I’d stick with the champions retaining and losing at another date. Not often you’ll get defending champions at this price, so Zelina & Carmella would be a good pick if you’re looking to make some money.

Singles Match
Johnny Knoxville (-300) vs. Sami Zayn (+200)

gotta say, not at all impressed watching professional rollerblader Johnny Knoxville doxxing our boy @SamiZayn and causing him severe emotional distress. not cool. pic.twitter.com/AE8WtjGJ2g

— PROPAGANDHI (@propagandhi) March 23, 2022

WrestleMania is not for people like me. I’m an old man that has never had any interest in Johnny Knoxville and his Jackass antics, and there’s really nothing he can do to change that. It isn’t a personal dislike or anything like that, I’m just not into that culture. They’re not trying to get people like me to buy in anyway, so it doesn’t really matter. All that matters for the purposes of this exercise is if Johnny Knoxville can draw a good number of his fans to watch WrestleMania, and maybe get them to stick around for other shows. Will it work? Beats the heck out of me!

I get the idea of having the Jackass guy win, and it’s not like Sami’s heat is going to get hurt by such a loss. We’re past the point where things like that actually matter. However, it’s not like Johnny Knoxville needs a win, and Sami Zayn gloating about beating him would make for some good entertainment. I might throw a buck or two on Sami.

Singles Match
Pat McAfee (-180) vs. Austin Theory (+140)

Look who got to take a selfie with Austin Theory🤳🏼😜 #ATownDown #allday #wwe pic.twitter.com/bV2tQyfxHZ

— Austin Theory (@austintheory1) March 27, 2022

WrestleMania is not for people like me. I’m an old man that has never had much interest in McAfee and his podcast antics, and there’s really nothing he can do to change that. It isn’t a personal dislike or anything like that, I’m just not into that culture. They’re not trying to get people like me to buy in anyway, so it doesn’t really matter. All that matters for the purposes of this exercise is if Pat McAfee can draw a good number of his fans to watch WrestleMania, and maybe get them to stick around for other shows. Will it work? Beats the heck out of me!

Yes, I’ve basically used the same paragraph for three matches now. That’s WrestleMania. WWE’s best way to appeal to a more mainstream audience in 2022 is to get celebrities that are more mainstream. We as a species can’t agree on much these days, but most of us share an unhealthy level of interest in celebrities and their exploits. You saw how crazy people went over the Will Smith/Chris Rock thing at the Oscars. Of course, the difference is that the Oscars can make people believe it’s real, while pro wrestling lost that ability a long time ago.

In fairness to McAfee, he isn’t the typical celebrity wrestler. He has shown some athletic ability, and there’s no doubt that he cares about the wrestling business. It’s not just a paycheck for him. He’s not my cup of tea as an announcer or as a podcast host, but that’s ok. I have more faith in McAfee putting on an acceptable wrestling match, and not being carried to one like the others will be. The others got put in good hands, Austin Theory might be a good hand too but he’s never been in this kind of a situation.

That being said, Austin Theory has a lot of people with big names backing him up. Odds are good that he’ll be a pretty big deal in WWE. I’d give him the win here without a second thought.

Singles Match
AJ Styles (-200) vs. Edge (+150)

It was kinda hard to decide who I’m rooting for in the #AJStyles vs #Edge match… so I had to look deep within me and say “root for the man with the better hair” #wrestlemania pic.twitter.com/Jlw4gGxeTS

— Diva Incarnate (@NYCDemonD1va) March 29, 2022

Us old heads can remember a time where these guys were on top of (somewhat) competing companies. Edge was a multiple time world champion in WWE during the 2000s while AJ Styles was the top wrestler in TNA/Impact for most of the decade. So while I never remember thinking to myself about how amazing an AJ Styles vs. Edge match would be, I’m sure plenty of people out there did, and are having the time of their lives heading into Sunday.

Still not sure what this new Edge character is supposed to be, but it seems like he’s having fun. Good for him. The match seems like a coin flip to me, and I tend to lean towards wrestlers that have been with WWE for longer periods of time. In this case, that’s Edge.

Singles Match
Omos (-170) vs. Bobby Lashley (+130)

What’s a colossus to an All Mighty?

See you Sunday big man. Hope you liked the view tonight😤👊🏾#wrestlemania pic.twitter.com/wkk4ifaI7d

— Bobby Lashley (@fightbobby) March 29, 2022

I must be missing something here. This seems like the perfect opportunity to end that Omos winning streak, doesn’t it? Lashley is something of a monster himself, so a loss for Omos isn’t going to drastically change anybody’s opinion of the big guy. After losing, Omos gets mad and beats Lashley up, then you have something going forward.

Bobby Lashley‘s the pick from where I sit. I assume I’m missing something.

Champion vs. Champion
Roman Reigns (-350) vs. Brock Lesnar (+225)

Brock Lesnar goes at @WWERomanReigns' SUV in the parking lot.@BrockLesnar | #SmackDown pic.twitter.com/ZjWduNw6U4

— WWE on FOX (@WWEonFOX) March 26, 2022

I pause at the idea of Reigns vs. Lesnar III being the biggest WrestleMania match of all time. I will say that this is the biggest WrestleMania match they could do right now. There aren’t any bigger stars on WWE’s roster right now, and there aren’t any more believable stars either. There’s also quite a bit of intrigue too, as Roman is the clear favorite but it’s not like one can ever truly count out Brock Lesnar.

I see a similarity between the Reigns/Lesnar series & the Austin/Rock series. Rock lost to Austin at WrestleMania twice, but still kept moving up the ladder of stardom. Eventually, the one thing Rock hadn’t done was beat Austin at WrestleMania, and he finally did it on the third attempt. Reigns’ third attempt at beating Lesnar at WrestleMania happens on Sunday, and this feels like the time for it to happen.

I don’t know if it really counts as “passing the torch” anymore, but Roman Reigns will be winning a WrestleMania event for the 15th time this Sunday. I might be off on that number by a few, but you know what I mean.

Enjoy WrestleMania, and good luck if you decide to put some money on it! Just make sure to give me my cut.